how vague…

I suppose that last post seems vague, abstract and maybe even a little off…I realize that in pursuit of my honest life I am going to step on a few toes along the way and that some encounters I have aren’t going to be as easy to discuss as others. The things I talk about in my past seem so far removed from me now that although wading through the uncomfortable muck of it all is emotional, it is not difficult. And on the flip side, things I experience now are less emotional to me because I chose for it to be that way but I seem to have more difficulty addressing them. So to clarify and be honest. I had an amazing day out on the water on Sunday and upon returning home, checked my social media site like I am sure we all do at some point during the day. Upon doing this I noticed that a person I considered a very good friend was breaking bread with the person who assaulted me with a bottle to the face. To say that I was angry/hurt/disappointed/in awe  would be an under statement. This good friend and I have had conversations about her feelings for the person who assaulted me, about her attitude towards it all and that same person was not a very good friend to her either, lying and attempting to guilt her into certain things….so I was shocked that they were not only together, but eating together. The feelings of disappointment and hurt probably lasted about 5 minutes and I chose not to react or respond because really….what’s the point? at this point in my life, I only have room and time for people I can trust. It’s not that I am burning bridges or trying to dictate who anyone else allows in their life, it’s that I want quality of character in my life and although I am FAR FAR FAR from perfect and I have made mistakes, had lapses in judgement, made poor choices at times, I simply can’t afford to take chances allowing that much negativity to affect my life. I did that once and those same people revealed in my pain, made fun of my medical condition, and made it a point to hurt me. I forgave once and learned a very valuable lesson about myself and them. Everyone is welcome to do whatever they want, with whoever they want and in any manner they chose. I am choosing to protect and stay true to me. I have no ill will, no nothing really….carry on.


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