I want to live boldly. Emphasis on LIVE. I’ve spent so long existing, so long being everyone else’s everything that I haven’t been truly living until recently. I am learning to say “NO” without feeling like I am letting someone else down or disappointing someone or being selfish. Being fearless, living fearless does not mean living without fear, it means embracing the fear and using it as fuel to push forward, headstrong into life. In the same way that I am trying to use my body as a vessel to enjoy this life as opposed to using it as punishment. I struggle everyday with choices, but I’m getting better, living better. I thought after E that I wouldn’t want to be around another man intimately (not sex, the emotional meaning of intimate) for a long, long time. I thought I was going to hang the ‘closed for business’ sign and slip into a solitary existence. I was determined to not be hurt again…but then reality set in and the bottom line is this… I LIKE people. Let me clarify, I like GOOD people and I have been fortunate enough in my life to find GOOD, quality people. I also like meeting new people. There is a world and wealth of information and knowledge and opportunity that comes from reaching out to the human experience. I don’t want to miss out on any of it. I am living fearless these days….emphasis on LIVING.
