I would first like to start off by saying thank you. Thank you for each and every experience you brought into my life over the last year. Trust me when I say I learned the most valuable lessons of my life so far and had the biggest year of personal growth.
I learned what it felt like to truly forgive, not just others who have wronged me, but myself for the mistakes that I have made.I learned to accept that I am human and not as evolved as I would like to be, but am a work in progress. I learned that I want to be a better version of myself and not strive for any unrealistic adaptations of what I think I should be. I learned that the greatest gift we can give one another as human beings is forgiveness. No one’s heart should bear the burden of regret. Forgiveness allows us to heal. It is the foundation for all metamorphosis, no matter what your belief system.
I learned what it was like to love unconditionally. To look at another’s faults and flaws and accept them exactly as they are in the moment with no expectation for change. I will attempt over the coming months to apply this same love to myself. I deserve the same unconditional love that I am able to give so freely. I know that it does not reside in another person, but from within my shell. I learned that my heart was an infinite vessel for compassion and that I am most happy when I am in service to another, in whatever form that takes. My heart was designed not for receiving but with the purpose of giving.
I learned what it was like to have my heart broken, several times, in many different ways. Yet here I sit, still dancing to my own beat, unwilling to accept anything less than extraordinary. Because I am no ordinary love. My love is not for the faint of heart and I want someone who loves all of me. In my totality, all my crazy, all my passion, all my surrender.
I learned what it was like to face one of my biggest fears, stare it directly in the face and embrace it in a way that it could no longer fuel me negatively. I learned that loss is inevitable and that no one belongs to anyone else and that we are all just here passing through.
I learned loyalty and I learned what it was like to let go. I still struggle with the “letting go” part, but I promise in the year to come to embrace that ideal as well.
So I eagerly await what is in store for me for the coming year. I want to go into 2016 fearless. I want my heart to remain open. I want to see the very best in people despite what they may offer as evidence.
I have all the things I need. I no longer wish to accumulate products or possessions. I would like to spend the next year giving and receiving time instead. I would like to offer my time to help others less fortunate. I would like others to give me the gift of their time as well, to build relationships, to make new memories, to experience the world in a way that is fresh and new with each sunrise. I want to offer gratitude at each sunset for living through yet another miraculous day, because although I may face struggles, somewhere at any given moment, someone else’s miracle is occurring.
I want to practice the art of patience and the art of being in the moment. I want to let go of the past, of how I think things should be, of preconceived notions for where I think my life could have taken me and accept that I am exactly where I am supposed to be.
I want to make the best of all of my circumstances…good, bad or indifferent. And let’s face it…I want to learn to allow the people who want to remain in my life to do so and love them back as exquisitely as they love me and allow those who do not wish to remain in my life to do so without consequence or judgment. I want to believe they are simply making room for new people to enter my world.
And Universe…I would really like to learn grace in all situations. I sometimes allow my emotions to get the better of me and I although I have appreciated the many lessons over the last year, the one I have cherished the most is learning when to remain silent. (I’m still working on that one.)
I am ready for you 2016.
Photo Credit : Jason D. Page