I don’t  know why I asked a question that I already knew the answer too. Perhaps I just wanted you to be as brave as I was. I put it all out there today, took every risk my heart would allow and I wanted your heart to do the same.

My mind, my heart know the answer despite the words that follow. But I suppose I needed to hear it just once.

Just once I wanted someone else to risk it all for me.

I hate being this way, tattered, torn.

There is no balance, no shutting off this wild swinging world that resides in my head…

My OCD is in overdrive now, perhaps the new stresses

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