Time is a funny thing…it’s a relative thing too right?
I mean how many times have you looked down at your watch or phone only to realize the day was half over and you have no idea how time could move so fast. On the other hand how many times have you looked at the clock on the wall in a waiting room, a classroom, a meeting and the minutes appear to drag on for an eternity?
Time is relative.
For me the days, weeks and first few months after my rape seemed like an eternity, each moment more painful than the last. I was a very cooperative, very willing participant for my own justice, believing naively that if I fought with conviction, allowing truth to be my beacon and measure that I would be rewarded by those who were charged with bringing my rapist to justice fighting with the same conviction. I couldn’t have been more wrong.
Instead what I ran into was ego, apathetic bureaucracy and just plain negligence. And here’s the thing about ego…when you allow it to rule you, you lose sight of the bigger picture. When we close our minds off or when we make blanket statements about how things are “normally” done we automatically eliminate possibilities.
And here is where I simply could not reconcile my fight for justice with those charged with executing justice on behalf of the United States, hey Patrick Air Force Legal Department this is for you…
I certainly don’t have all the answers, but I do have the answers to what I know, what I’ve experienced, the people who have continually come forward to me with their own issues/complaints/criminal activity/violations etc and I have disclosed those things over and over again in attempt to get someone, anyone to listen and take action. What I have tried to explain repeatedly is that there is a time frame for everything. There are windows of opportunity that present themselves and if you chose not to grab hold of those opportunities because your ego won’t allow, you are simply perpetuating the cycle of injustice.
Tsgt Keith Alan Snyder is and has been for many, many years a black stain on the United States Air Force. He has prior sexual misconduct on his service record, a victim who was transferred off base that should be interviewed for propensity evidence. He has a conviction for a DUI and other charges that he incurred AFTER he was charged with six counts of sexual assault with bodily injury. He lied to the USAF about his criminal behavior in Tennessee. He has served jail time for his DUI and has remaining jail time to serve in December. He has had an adulterous affair with another Airman’s wife AFTER his criminal charges which resulted in a pregnancy he will likely not be around for and he has violated his no-contact and military protective order on multiple occasions with only paperwork as punishment. To date other women have contacted me to report abuses by Tsgt Keith Alan Snyder as well and those names have been turned over to the legal department at Patrick Air Force base and to date, eleven months later not one of them has been contacted.
I have reported stalking and harassment not just of myself but of another victim. I have provided that person’s contact information, to date they have not been contacted. I have reiterated my concerns for months in writing and by phone and documented everything and still not a phone call has been made.
Now the legal department is reading my blog activity and they’re nervous because I have decided that my effort will match their effort which is nil…I find it disturbingly amusing that they can read my blog and reach out to my attorney yet still can’t pick up a phone to make a call to interview other victims of this serial rapist.
Time didn’t heal my wounds. Time didn’t erase the soul-crushing pain I feel every moment of every day. Time hasn’t erased the stench of Gouda smoked macaroni and cheese from my nostrils or the feeling of being crushed beneath the weight of someone who outweighed me by 100lbs and towered over me by 18 inches. Time hasn’t helped me scrub the feeling of him from my skin no matter how many baths I take, no matter how many times I scold my skin with water too hot for a human being. Time hasn’t eradicated the feeling of wiping his semen off of my body after he used me up and discarded me after the rape. Time.
It’s been 11 months and it feels as though I live that nightmare every single day. So for me, TIME has stood still.
For them, it’s just another day at the office. Another day of not following up, another day of neglecting to respond to simple requests, another day of failing to take any action because…ego? laziness? corruption? negligence? bias? incompetence? who knows…
So now, I’m doing things on MY terms on MY time because my TIME here on earth has become increasingly shortened. My TIME is limited and the very limited nature of that makes my time precious.
So instead of reading my blog and reaching out to my attorney, how about you reach out to his other victims? How about you make those calls? How about you do something…anything resembling why you got into the field of prosecutory law to begin with?
How about you uphold the constitutional rights of the victims your case is directly linked to?
How about you look at the wording of the MPO that was issued and take action based on the actual document and not YOUR perceived level of danger but the FACTUAL proven violation?
I know…weird to think I would want you to enforce the order as it was WRITTEN and not as YOU interpret it…
I am now a victim in complete and total fear for my life as my rapist has been given free reign to do as he pleases. what will it mean for me and my personal safety if I testify if the measures put in place are not enforced?
You’ve gambled enough of my life…
A disgruntled witness.